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Saturday, November 29, 2008

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Friday, November 28, 2008

I know, I know

Ok I know I know its been forever. In fact I am sure a lot of you have stopped checking. For those of you who haven't thanks and sorry I have let you down. I promise to be a little better and very soon a recap since the last time that I posted.
However, this post will be a little different. I have a lot of thoughts, emotions, concerns, and I thought writing them out will help me sort through them. This Thanksgiving has been a very emotional one for me. Tears of sadness, joy, hurt, and fear. So often something will happen in my life that is a big or major thing. Or at least until things are put into perspective.
Though things I go through are challenging I have faith that God is in control. He knows what's best even if its not our plan. Sometimes some of our biggest trials are our biggest lessons. I know this is stuff many of you know, but for me I need to be reminded of it because in the midst of it I am certainly not thinking of it.
Recently I have been overwhelmed with hurts of so many loved ones, friends and family. Hurts that are not simple fixes. There is nothing i can do to ease that pain for them. That's what hurts the most for me. When people I love hurt I feel it with them.
So as many of you know I am from back east, Pennsylvania to be exact. As the Holidays are here I am feeling very homesick. A feeling I am not used to. Don't get me wrong I love it here and as so thankful to have family two hours away and family right here in town with me. A lot of people don't even have that, I know. I think as I am getting a little, very little bit older I am realizing just how important family really is.
While feeling all of this pain and sadness, I am reminded of how blessed I am. Now don't get me wrong I've got junk, problems, and pain in my life as all of us do. I have a great husband who makes his family such an important priority. He loves us so much and for that I am overwhelmed with love and gratitude. I have healthy, fun, and challenging boys. Boys who keep me on my toes, who make me melt everyday. I could go on and on, I could also tell you I have some of my most challenging days with them. But that's my life and I would not trade it for anything. I have amazing family who loves us all and so thankful for my relationships with all of them. My friends, I am amazed at all the wonderful friends I have. Friends that would do anything for me, drop everything if I needed them. Not everyone can say that.
So this Thanksgiving, I want to thank you, thank you all for being part of my life. I pray for you all daily. I pray that whatever you go through you are able to find joy. I pray you have a relationship with the Lord, because there is no worldly thing or person that can give you a peace the way he can.

Thank you so much for letting me express my thoughts, even if they are all over the place.